Helping Your Family Cope with Anxiety and Stress

     The sudden loss of life as we've known it has been an experience. Not just for us as individuals, but also as a family unit. The financial uncertainty, the stressors of disrupted routines and lifestyles, the health concerns- all of it takes a toll on us emotionally. And it continues to rapidly change from day to day. As parents it is important that we not only cope and grow through this pandemic, but also that we help our children do the same. So today we want to address the big emotions and anxiety that we are all experiencing and come up with an action plan to help you and your family work through that in a positive manner.

Let them worry:

     We all know from personal experience that being told to "relax" or "not to worry" never works so we can't expect it to be the magic cure all with our children. Worry and fear is a natural part of life. It is an important executive function that warns of us of danger. And danger is a part in our day to day life. It is okay to have concerns and be cautious. Our children need to understand that. We don't want them avoiding these concerns or unable to cope with their worries on a daily basis. Raising a Warrior means they are stronger and better prepared for the stress of life than that.

Build an individualized coping kit:

     We all soothe in different ways. There are the standard count to 10, take deep breathes, go to your happy place, and listen to upbeat music that our children need as the foundation for their coping kit. But what about beyond that. We're all different and we have to explore to find what truly works for us. I mean just consider how you deal with stress and anxiety personally. Do you feel most relaxed after a nap? Does creating or moving your body bring you peace? What's your go to movie or show after a hard day? Do you prefer to lose yourself in a good book or a virtual gaming world? Maybe a bubble bath before bed does the trick? You've had years to develop these coping rituals. Now is an excellent time to begin adding to your child's healthy coping kit.

Vent and then positively reframe:

     Our heads can be a confusing place. Sometimes we just need to get those thoughts out and into the air. Be that safe space your child can always turn to. Let them know now, while they're young, that they can always air their concerns with you. Teach them to use a journal as a way to get out of their head. These are only the first steps, however. Once we've given voice to these fears we have to be able to break them down to ascertain the truth of our concerns. Once we've realized the reality of our fear we can begin to positively reframe it. If your child is concerned about getting sick view the facts. You're all staying home. They aren't exposed to other people. The chance is very minimal for them (especially if you parents are working from home). Help them realize this reality. Then you can begin teaching them to positively reframe their concerns. Yes they're afraid of being sick, but because they're following the rules to shelter in place it is unlikely. They can then positively take stock of the actual situation and be grateful for their health, that their family gets to stay home, etc. 

Make sure the basics are covered:

     Our anxiety and stress level go up when we aren't taking care of ourselves optimally. If your child is living a quarantined life without routine, or bedtimes, or restrictions on sugar/caffeine then their anxiety and stress levels will naturally be high. So if your child (or you) are struggling with excessive anxiety during this time make sure your basics are covered. Make sure you're getting enough sleep. That they're moving their body and eating healthy. That time is being spent outside. With the basic necessities in order your family will be much more resilient to the highs and lows of life. 

Empathize always:

     Anxiety can be paralyzing at times for all of us. We can be completely overwhelmed by our anxious thoughts and struggle to do even the most basic of tasks. Anxiety also makes us shy away from the things we love. We are all experiencing this together. Rather than social distancing we believe a more positive reframe is physical distance with a strong social support team. So empathize always. Understand that this is a very emotional and trying experience for every member in our household and take the time to be present and take care of one another. And yes that means we also need to prioritize your own needs. We can't give our families our best if we aren't seeing to us as well.

     The bottom line is none of us are alone. We will get through this TOGETHER. We are STRONGER... together. So keep going! One day at a time. We will beat this and be stronger having lived through it.

#RaiseAWarrior