Shelter In Place: A Family Experience

     As our shelter in place continues to stretch on we are all faced with new challenges to adapt and overcome. Some families passed through many of these hurdles in the beginning. Those first few days cooped up together were a battle as everyone struggled to adjust and develop new routines. Other families are just now hitting these walls. Originally these changes were viewed as a fun adventure. Everyone was excited for the opportunity and the change. Now that the novelty has worn off this new season of life looks like less of a grand adventure, and more like a bad dream we wish would end. No matter your family stage on this journey things are hard and we will have to continue to be flexible and patient with ourselves and each other.

     We can't allow ourselves to give into frustration or be overwhelmed by this current season. Because pandemic or not, this is still a formative time for our children. Yes, this is challenging. And yes, we are all pioneers in this brave new world. However, life goes on. We need to not only survive this season, but as families we must continue to thrive. I mean honestly we are living in an unparalleled stage that might one day be in future generations history books. When your children's great grand kids ask them what they remember of the COVID-19 pandemic of 2020 what will they say? What will stand out to them?

     As weird as it sounds this outbreak has presented some great opportunities for families to bond and make special memories together. We, as parents, can make this time special. We can make this shelter in place a magical time that your child will fondly remember and love to share with posterity. If we choose to use this time to our advantage. Everyday life before the outbreak was busy, busy, busy. We constantly were telling ourselves and our children that 'we would love to do (BLANK) if only we had more time.' Now is our shot! So here are some ideas to continue making the most of this shelter in place something worth remembering...

DOCUMENT THE JOURNEY: 

     Our life is worth remembering. Having a visual or written version of our story gives us something joyful to look back on when things are hard or we are separated from the ones we love. So get the whole family involved. Consider making a movie or scrapbook about your family. Have everyone keep a journal or make a time capsule to bury and commemorate life before and during the pandemic. You can make this as practical or fun as you want to.

SHARE YOUR CHILDHOOD: 

     Being a kid is very different from how things were back in our day. Use this as an opportunity to share your favorite memories and teach your child the games and activities you enjoyed as a kid. Were you a pro hula hooper? Did you used to skateboard? Were you on a roller derby? Pull your equipment from the garage or snag it online and see if you've still got the moves.

CREATE NEW TRADITIONS: 

     Building weekly traditions is all about strengthening your family's routines and giving everyone happy things to look forward too (and depending on the tradition it can help you keep track of the days of the week during this strange new era). Now is the time to start having Taco Tuesday, Breakfast for Dinner, or Sundae Sunday. Now is the time to build weekly habits of being active together. Now is the time for walks after dinner, board game nights, or home movie theater days! Have some fun with it. Get everyone together and vote on what you want to do. Or write it down and randomly draw an idea (or two, or three) for the week.

MAKE THE ORDINARY, EXTRAORDINARY:

     There are certain things that have to be done. Bath time, work, school, exercise, bedtime, etc. Find ways to put a little extra magic in it. Maybe bath times include glow sticks now. All exercising is now a competition for who can has the best form or is the most flexible. Bedtime now involves a story under a makeshift blanket fort with a flashlight. Maybe you do school outside. Use this time we've been given to add magic to the ordinary.

    The bottom line is childhood is a magical experience, and shelter in place can be too. Making some special or uniquely out of the ordinary is what childhood memories are made of. So despite the fears many of us have and the anxiety, let's use this opportunity to sow a little joy in our homes. And as you allow the magic of new traditions to take root in your hearts you might just find sheltering in place isn't as bad as it was before.

#RaiseAWarrior 

Looking Beyond Ourselves When Things Are Hard

 Raising children who are compassionate is no small feat in today's world. Especially with mainstream media pushing images of the selfish and sometimes indifferent lifestyles of pop culture stars. Filling YOUR wants, YOUR needs, and achieving YOUR dreams has become our youth's priority. And while those aren't inherently bad goals it does promote a certain egocentrism that we don't want taking root in our family and homes.

     Right now especially it would be very easy for us to focus on ourselves. The problems shelter in place has created for us. What we've lost during the quarantine. All the things we miss. Focus on our boredom or how unhappy this temporary situation makes us. We could even justify that this is a normal response to what we're going through. Normal or average isn't necessarily the standard we are aiming for. Yes, we've been blessed. Yes, we are used to a certain lifestyle and want it back ASAP. But to spend this time focusing on that, would be a waste of one of life's most precious gifts. Our time. If we remain unable to see outside of ourselves and our problems then this season will be very difficult. But if we can see what we truly have, in this moment, by recognizing all others do not have- it will allow us to realistically be more content, happy, and productive during this season. So here's a family centered action plan to start looking beyond yourself.

COURTESY AND RESPECT, AT ALL TIMES

     Children hear our words, but they truly follow our lead. Which means if we expect them to show compassion in how they treat others, then we have to do the same. At all times. So if you've been frustrated instead of lashing out, speak respectfully. Teach them to consider how their actions make another feel. Walk them through the process of why you said "They hurt your feelings" instead of immediately sending them to their room. All of our relationships can benefit from an extra dose of compassion so take the time to use daily occurrences as the springboard for these teaching moments.

PRACTICE VIEWING THINGS FROM ANOTHER POINT OF VIEW

     Everyone has bad days. If someone is rude at the grocery store or while driving your children notice that and your response. Acknowledge that we shouldn't behave that way, but also try to put some perspective on it. Teach them to try to have some understanding for the wealth of things occurring in another's live that they don't see. Say "Wow, they really must have had a bad day to talk to others so rudely." Then apply this same practice within our home as well. If a sibling or someone in the family is having a hard time help your child take a moment and try to see things from their side of it. Being able to see things from another's point of view and be aware of how other's are feeling really sets the stage for some great patience, kindness, and compassion.

FIND WAYS TO HELP, NO MATTER HOW SMALL

     Although things are complicated right now with the pandemic if it is safe and you are able to help another do so. Sew masks as a family. Send letters to the brave essential personnel working hard to keep our city going. Regularly call extended family and try to send smiles to those stuck in Nursing home's and the hospital without visitors. Check in with friends. Show them that these little things can make a huge impact. Get the whole family involved in the Warrior compassion and gratitude challenges that our online training program is doing. Let's teach our children that anytime is the right time to engage in acts of service and show compassion for others.

     Looking beyond ourselves is a skill set that takes time to develop. It is going to take some truly conscious and concentrated effort to become a habit. But if you take the time to instill compassion and empathy in your family now, it is one of those umbrella character traits that blossoms into greater patience, understanding and kindness. And even if it is just you and your child spreading that love out into the world in a million seemingly little ways, that compassion has power. And it tends to spread. So let's see if we can spread compassion more quickly than the corona we are currently trying to flatten. We've got this!

#RaiseAWarrior 

Parenting Through Trying Times

     Raise your hands up if parenting through a pandemic is hard! We hear ya Warrior parents. There is little to no access to childcare, school is out, and we can't rely on grandparents or babysitters like we used to. It's just us in the middle of it all. Through thick and thin. And it's not that we weren't doing all of this before. That we could manage. It's that now we have to do it all simultaneously. You're doing conference meetings while being home with your children. You're being the school teacher and working from home. Essentially this pandemic is forcing us to wear all our hats at once. Remember when we thought busy was the hardest part about being a parent? This is a whole other ball game. So how do we crush it all? And how do we avoid burnout while doing all the things at once?

This is a marathon, not a sprint:

      No matter what athletic venture you consider there is a basic formula for success. And that is stress + rest = growth. You don't have to be a seasoned parent to know that this is a hard calling. The fluctuating levels of stress is a given. But if we don't take moments to rest, if we are spread too thin, we cannot grow. It isn't rocket science that exhaustion effects our mood. We are less capable of kind and compassionate parenting when there is chance to recoup. And we do not know how long this shelter in place will last. So make time to rest. It will help you and your whole family get through this season.

Prioritize what's on your plate:

     Now is not the time for Instagram worthy parenting. Life is not picture perfect. And that is okay. This is a 24/7 experience and sometimes it won't be perfectly organized or clean. Maybe today you have a lot of work that has to get. Kids get a little more lax electronics day. The only rule currently is there are no rules! So do the best you can every single day. There is nothing that says you can't catch up on a missed school work day over the weekend. Tackle the most important things first. Those things with immediate and time sensitive deadlines first. A helpful thing to keep you on track is to every morning (or the night before) list the 3 things you have to get done for the day. Nothing else on your to do get's tackled until those are done unless it's an absolute emergency. Our plates are full. We've got to prioritize, break down, and conquer. You can do this!

Count the moments, not hours:

     Many of us are used to having some time to ourselves during the work day or after while the kids are in school, participating in sports or other after school activities. Now that is not the case. There aren't spare hours of solitude to look forward too. So we have to count the moments. If we focus on what we had it only breeds discontent. We have to find a way to positively reframe this new life we're living. So seek out and count the moments. Count the moments you get to yourself. Count the moments you aren't being badgered with questions. Count the moments you get to breathe. These are the moments you get to unwind, refill and just be. And they are so important. Don't let a never ending to do list steal those away from you. They should be a priority.

Keep connecting with others:

     Right now it is easy to feel isolated and alone in our struggles. Everything about life is in a weird sort of limbo. It is continuing, but we're all holding out for things to go back to normal ASAP so we aren't really trying to make this new season our new normal so it's an odd place to be. We have to connect. Have video chats with the friends, and co-workers you regularly used to lean on. You are all feeling isolated and even a few moments reconnecting with those relationships or checking in can go a long ways towards filling you. Have a virtual coffee date. Take a workout class together. Thanks to technology social distancing means we are never alone so use that to your advantage. Keep connecting with those adult peers. Give yourself opportunities to appropriately vent. Those few moments invested in yourself pays dividends out to the whole family.

    These are hard times, but you aren't facing them alone. Your Warrior's Way tribe is here, and still going strong. You may feel cut off from your extended family and friends, but we aren't truly. So chin up and don't forget you have to rest some to successfully grow through these stressors and come out stronger on the other side. Until then

#RaiseAWarrior 

Stop Yelling: Positive Parenting Tactics for Warrior Parents

     We are doing it Warrior families! We're that much closer to a return to normal. Now we understand being cooped up all this time is wearing you down. Everyone has cabin fever. Emotions are high and patience is getting a little thin to say the least. And when our patience gets worn down we tend to yell a lot more. Yelling was a standard parenting tactic when we were younger, but that doesn't necessarily make it the best option. So this week we're tackling why yelling isn't necessarily the best (outside of emergencies of course) and how to make the switch to a more positive and productive method of discipline.

3 Reasons Why Yelling Isn't The Best

1.  It is ultimately a band aid solution: Obedience was the focus of parenting when we were growing up. Which is why yelling worked so well. Yelling invokes a fear or startle response in a child. And so they respond with obedience to make it stop. However, this is a very temporary behavior fix. Yelling stops the act in progress. It doesn't teach why this behavior is undesirable or what to do instead. So ultimately no lesson is learned and the misbehavior will rear it's head at a later day.
2. It damages your relationship: Losing our temper regularly can harm your relationship with your child. You want them to always be able to trust you. To know you will always have their back, love, and support them. Yelling doesn't instill that knowledge in a growing child, because us yelling is a negative in a very big way. When we are yelled at it is a put down. We will lose it from time to time. It happens. No one is perfect. But we have to make sure our child knows this was a momentary loss of temper. If they don't see it as you losing control they begin to believe you really view them in that negative light. And that can greatly impact your growing child's sense of self esteem, as well as how they view you and their relationship with you.
3. It models poor communication: Those first connections with our family is what we most commonly model future relationships after. Think about your experiences through the years- whether you realized it at the time or not we all seek out relationships and connections that we are comfortable with. And that means we seek things we have experience with, whether it's the good or the bad. Do we want our children to seek out connections with people who consistently yell, scream at, and put them down? Or do we want more for our children? We have to model good communication and point out when we mess up so our children learn to recognize whats acceptable and whats not. And the stronger we can instill that understanding the easier it will be on them in the future when they start seeking out partners, and building a family of their own.

4 Things To Do Instead Of Yelling

1. Know your triggers: Yelling doesn't just happen for no reason. There is no mystery if we take some time to self reflect. There are specific patterns or triggers that consistently send us over the edge. Maybe you only yell when you're extremely tired. Maybe you only yell when you have a headache or are hangry. Maybe sibling arguing pushes you over the edge because you hate your current relationship with your sibling. There is always a reason. You just have to identify your individual triggers. Then you can start fighting this bad habit and move to a more controlled and kinder method of parenting.
2. Use reminders: Our kids have things they love and enjoy same as us. We've mentioned multiple times that gradual times help both us and our children transition mentally and emotionally to whats next. To demand they stop their game right now is a tad unrealistic. It isn't necessarily fair for us to yell when they don't comply. I mean we can, but it isn't the best way to handle this. Instead let them know it's 10 minutes until game shut off and dinner time. Then calmly do your part to honor that time frame. 
3. Take a time out: If you find yourself triggered by your child's behavior or a situation take a moment to breathe and work through those emotions. You can do this by either removing yourself from the situation or by momentarily sending your child in a time out while you calm down. It is hard to teach when we're seeing red. Whether its you who needs the timeout or them, step away and breathe. Then you can come back calmer and address the true issue and the solution for next time.
4. Yelling Debriefs: There are times when you will lose your temper. You will still intermittently yell and we can guarantee you will almost always feel bad afterwards. It is good to acknowledge that. Go to your child. Apologize. Reconnect. And take the time to teach. Explain what got you so bothered and how they can do their part to help prevent this situation from repeating itself. 

    Bottom line is there is a never ending learning curve to parenting. We don't have the cure all solution for what you're struggling with, but we are here to help. Struggling with something in particular? Let us know and our instructors can cover it during our weekly instructor zoom chats. We're here for you during the shelter in place. Our goals and mission are the same. We want to help you and your child be the best you can be. Even ole 'rona can't change that. We've got this!

#RaiseAWarrior 

When Your Child Lies

     We want our children to grow up to be good, productive, happy members of society. And so we try to impart our wisdom and build within them a strong sense of character and a good moral compass. But no matter how hard we try, sooner or later all kids lie. And that's a little upsetting to us parents. It feels a bit like failure.

     The truth is all children will go through a lying phase. It is a normal stage of cognitive development to begin telling tall tales and exaggerating the truth. It is a sign of increased word skill and an active imagination. But as those tall tales turn into little white lies, and then on towards lying to avoid consequences, discomfort, or undesirable activities we start to get concerned. And we absolutely should Warrior parents. Because if we don't take a stand against lying now, they'll only get better at hiding the truth from us as they get older. We have a few short years of pivotal influence over the character of our growing child and we have to make the most of that. So here is an action plan to stop lying and help get your Little Warrior or keep them on track.

Check Yourself

     Tooth Fairy... Santa Clause... Easter Bunny... these are some little white lies meant to keep the magic of childhood alive longer. And many parents feel that's a good enough cause to stretch the truth a bit. But what of the other, not so innocent lies we tell our children. The ones we tell to save time? The empty threats we use to try and get them to behave? The count down which everyone knows is a bluff. The lies we tell to get out of and delay their tricky questions? What kind of example are we setting by regularly lying to our child? What damage is being done as they start to realize not to trust everything we say? How can we expect them to value honesty, when we don't hold ourselves to the same standards.

Give Them A Chance To Think

     Most of us have heard of the fight or flight mechanisms that are inherently ingrained to us. Studies are showing more and more that there are two more sub types of knee jerk reactions. There is a freeze, and then (especially in children) there is a fib response also. When a child feels cornered and like punishment is looming, sometimes the lies begin to spill forth. This is because they are impulsively blurting out an answer before taking the time to think, and respond appropriately. So teach your child to count think before they speak. If they do blurt out something untrue, stay calm. When we react angrily or with judgement they will continue to spew forth lies to diffuse the situation. Instead, stay calm. Take a breath yourself and ask them if they "would like a moment to think about their answer?" Usually this patient reproach is all it takes to get them back on track without further confrontation. Once they've mastered this step you can start teaching them what consequences naturally come from lying (i.e. lost friends, lost trust, etc) so they can begin to think on those possibilities while they pause before they speak.

Don't Play Detective

     This one is hard to do (or in this case, not do). Sometimes our parenting "spidey-sense" just starts to tingle and we smell a rat. But the truth is when we try and intermittently fail to detect when they are lying or not, we are giving our child a chance to perfect this skill set. And that isn't good for any of us in the long run. Since children often lie to avoid punishment sometimes it is better to simply state the obvious and move onto a small, but consistent discipline. So instead of getting into the drama of "I shoved him because he cut in line," and "I cut in line because he said she was my girlfriend." Try instead "We don't shove. Please take a five-minute timeout." 

Emphasize Good Relationships

     Many lies are told when a growing child or teen's sense of self worth or image is threatened. This can lead to complications between friends, social circles, and in our home. One of the best things my parents did growing up was emphasize the strength of our relationship. That no matter what I had done I couldn't change their love for me. My self worth, that image of our relationship was never threatened and could never be threatened. They were a safety net, no matter the hour. They didn't insist to know every aspect of my life, but they did sleep soundly knowing I would always call if I needed help.

     So take the time to build up a strong foundation of trust and honesty during their early years. Teach your child to examine why they were tempted to lie in the first place. Help them work through the consequences that come from lying. Always be honest yourself. Take the time to praise their honesty because you know it wasn't the easy thing to do. And continue to build up that moral compass to ensure they'll always have it to help during difficult times and when the stress of growing up gets a little too intense.

#RaiseAWarrior 

Helping Your Family Cope with Anxiety and Stress

     The sudden loss of life as we've known it has been an experience. Not just for us as individuals, but also as a family unit. The financial uncertainty, the stressors of disrupted routines and lifestyles, the health concerns- all of it takes a toll on us emotionally. And it continues to rapidly change from day to day. As parents it is important that we not only cope and grow through this pandemic, but also that we help our children do the same. So today we want to address the big emotions and anxiety that we are all experiencing and come up with an action plan to help you and your family work through that in a positive manner.

Let them worry:

     We all know from personal experience that being told to "relax" or "not to worry" never works so we can't expect it to be the magic cure all with our children. Worry and fear is a natural part of life. It is an important executive function that warns of us of danger. And danger is a part in our day to day life. It is okay to have concerns and be cautious. Our children need to understand that. We don't want them avoiding these concerns or unable to cope with their worries on a daily basis. Raising a Warrior means they are stronger and better prepared for the stress of life than that.

Build an individualized coping kit:

     We all soothe in different ways. There are the standard count to 10, take deep breathes, go to your happy place, and listen to upbeat music that our children need as the foundation for their coping kit. But what about beyond that. We're all different and we have to explore to find what truly works for us. I mean just consider how you deal with stress and anxiety personally. Do you feel most relaxed after a nap? Does creating or moving your body bring you peace? What's your go to movie or show after a hard day? Do you prefer to lose yourself in a good book or a virtual gaming world? Maybe a bubble bath before bed does the trick? You've had years to develop these coping rituals. Now is an excellent time to begin adding to your child's healthy coping kit.

Vent and then positively reframe:

     Our heads can be a confusing place. Sometimes we just need to get those thoughts out and into the air. Be that safe space your child can always turn to. Let them know now, while they're young, that they can always air their concerns with you. Teach them to use a journal as a way to get out of their head. These are only the first steps, however. Once we've given voice to these fears we have to be able to break them down to ascertain the truth of our concerns. Once we've realized the reality of our fear we can begin to positively reframe it. If your child is concerned about getting sick view the facts. You're all staying home. They aren't exposed to other people. The chance is very minimal for them (especially if you parents are working from home). Help them realize this reality. Then you can begin teaching them to positively reframe their concerns. Yes they're afraid of being sick, but because they're following the rules to shelter in place it is unlikely. They can then positively take stock of the actual situation and be grateful for their health, that their family gets to stay home, etc. 

Make sure the basics are covered:

     Our anxiety and stress level go up when we aren't taking care of ourselves optimally. If your child is living a quarantined life without routine, or bedtimes, or restrictions on sugar/caffeine then their anxiety and stress levels will naturally be high. So if your child (or you) are struggling with excessive anxiety during this time make sure your basics are covered. Make sure you're getting enough sleep. That they're moving their body and eating healthy. That time is being spent outside. With the basic necessities in order your family will be much more resilient to the highs and lows of life. 

Empathize always:

     Anxiety can be paralyzing at times for all of us. We can be completely overwhelmed by our anxious thoughts and struggle to do even the most basic of tasks. Anxiety also makes us shy away from the things we love. We are all experiencing this together. Rather than social distancing we believe a more positive reframe is physical distance with a strong social support team. So empathize always. Understand that this is a very emotional and trying experience for every member in our household and take the time to be present and take care of one another. And yes that means we also need to prioritize your own needs. We can't give our families our best if we aren't seeing to us as well.

     The bottom line is none of us are alone. We will get through this TOGETHER. We are STRONGER... together. So keep going! One day at a time. We will beat this and be stronger having lived through it.

#RaiseAWarrior 

Cook With Your Family

     Many of us are just now realizing the truth of how much and how often we regularly eat out now that the convenience of such luxuries has become limited. And although this eye opening experience has added to the stress of sheltering in place it could become an area of growth if we allow it. Lately we've been talking about the wealth of opportunities the Falls sheltering in place has offered us as a family unit. Today we want to continue on that thread. What better use of this time than to make some memories and up your cooking skills together? So today we offer a brief list of some reasons why cooking together is awesome and some easy ways to incorporate your family in the kitchen (no matter their age) without losing your sanity or going hungry. 

Pros of getting everyone involved

1. It increases gratitude: Gratitude increases our overall emotional health and outlook. And it helps us better cope with situations that are difficult and outside our norm. When our children get reps in helping prepare the food we need everyday to survive they will learn to appreciate the time and effort involved in making meals. This helps them be more grateful for what is on their plate and the effort you put into making a special or favorite meal. and are more likely to recognize your efforts when you take the time to feed the family from home.
2. It helps grow past picky eating: Being a part of the process of baking or cooking can pique a child's curiosity. And an involved and curious child is more likely to be brave and go outside their comfort zone. So get those picky eaters involved. As they realize the foods they hate (i.e. tomatoes) make up some of their favorite foods (i.e. pizza, and spaghetti) they will be more willing to branch out and try things they had previously refused. Which is a big win in our book.
3. It teaches life skills: Following instructions, reading a recipe, sequencing, prioritizing, goal setting... baking and cooking together as a family offers a wealth of opportunities to teach essential life skills. Plus it gives you the comfort of knowing your future college student won't be surviving purely on PB&J or ramen noodles.
4. It brings everyone together: Some of my fondest memories are learning how to bake with my mom. Now to be honest I definitely made the process messier and more frustrating. But with every accidentally dropped egg on the floor, flour covered hugs, and burnt muffins we were making priceless memories and bonding. Every single time I bake, I think of those times with my mom. I can't smell fresh cookies or bread without those memories coming to mind. This does not mean I grew up an exceptional cook. But I have a deep-seeded love of baking because of my mom's patience and love.

How to make the switch

1. Make it a game: Depending on your level of culinary skill there are a variety of ways to do this. Maybe everyone picks a single ingredient and you come up with a way to incorporate them all like they do in the plethora of baking and cooking shows that are popular. Maybe you create a mystery basket of ingredients for you all to use. Maybe you each have a part in the process and everyone races to complete their step first. You are truly only limited by your imagination here so get creative and have some fun with it. Give silly prizes out to the cleanest helper in the kitchen or the most considerate assistant. Make dad the brave taste tester of your new concoctions and don't be afraid to have a pizza delivery as backup.
2. Use it as an excuse to bond one on one: Growing up in our family it would easily get crowded in the kitchen with all of us little helpers on board. So we each took turns on Sunday picking the menu for the day and then helping with every step of the process. This was a great way to cook as a family because it gave us some one on one time with our parents and made us feel special. Plus then everyone get's to learn how to make their favorite dishes and regularly see it in the menu.
3. Build a some healthy food based traditions: A lot of modern food traditions aren't necessarily healthy. We have sweets on birthdays. We gorge on the holidays. We can't set foot into a theater without grabbing all the snacks. Cooking together as a family and regularly coming together to eat as a family are healthy food based traditions that we can truly get behind and support. 

     So even though these suggestions might get a little messy we hope you use this quarantine time to do the things we are usually too busy to attempt. So have some fun and make some memories. Who knows, your kiddos might even start volunteering to help you. And isn't a helpful child every parents dream?

#RaiseAWarrior 

Contentment: A Lifestyle

     Our current culture, social lifestyle, and market philosophy is built around breeding discontentment. We are constantly seeking more. More things, more experiences, more friends, newer models of things we already have, and so much more. We do this because the best of life is constantly displayed in front of us. In commercials, in shows, by the media, and by our friend's social profiles and feeds. We are a generation of consumers and COVID-19 has quite suddenly cut us off from many of things and people we enjoy. And it is hard on all of us. This is an unprecedented challenge for our generation. And while we are all thankfully beginning to adjust to the routine of this new normal we are also going a little stir crazy. You see we've got all our tasks down now and are left emotionally with a "now what" attitude. The newness and challenge of this adventure has worn off. We would give anything to go to work, send the kids to school, or have a meetup with friends and family again. And yet we cannot. We should not. So how do we go beyond this task focused attitude? How do we move beyond just getting through towards a state of being emotionally satisfied with where we are in this moment? And how do we get our children to feel the same?

Contentment is about realistic expectations:

     One of the reasons this is so hard is because this whole pandemic situation blind sided us. We saw it happening in other places of the world, but never dreamed it would reach us. Life was normal and then it was suddenly upside down and unlike anything before. And even then we thought it would be passed us in a week or so if we all followed the rules. Now as the length of required time stretches further we realize how unrealistic our expectations of facing a pandemic were. This should come as a reality check for how blessed we are and how much we've taken for granted. While I have always enjoyed and prioritized time with my friends and family I didn't truly appreciate the convenience of it until these obstacles were placed in our way. So the first step towards true contentment is taking a look at our expectations. Are they realistic? Are we doing what we can to make those expectations come true or are we hoping for the best and leaving it up to fate? We have to work through our own expectations and then help our kiddos do that as well.

Contentment is a discipline:

     Many people confuse contentment with complacency or settling for the bare minimum. We believe this is flawed. Complacency leads to disappointment whereas contentment brings peace and joy. And it takes regular practice to be happy. You have to actively teach yourself to recognize and be grateful for what you have in this moment without wanting more. It requires us to teach ourselves and our children to slow down, appreciate the moment and not always wonder what's coming up next. It seems simple enough, but it takes true discipline to be consciously content in life's highs and life's lows

Contentment is recognizing the little things:

     To help you practice the discipline of contentment you have to get into the habit of recognizing and being grateful for the little things.That's why it goes perfectly with our upcoming word of the week: gratitude. When we are having an attitude of gratitude we are actively seeking out the little things that bless our life and building a lifestyle of contentment. We talked to the kiddos during mat chat about practicing recognizing their roses and thorns as a family during meal times. That means it's okay to acknowledge one of life's thorns that makes you sad or frustrates you, but you also have to acknowledge life's roses or the good that comes from this. For example: it is a thorn that I don't get to see my friends all the time, but the rose is I get to spend so much time building up and making memories with my family.

Contentment is remaining hopeful:

     Without hope and things to look forward to it is hard to be content with the season we are in. Maybe that means you and your family look forward to possibly going back to school this semester. Maybe you're hopes are a little further out and you look forward to that first summer day at Castaway cove. This is where we realistically hope for things in the future. And these hopes have to be fluid. It's okay to hope that this ends on or before May 5th. And if we reach that point it is okay to re-evaluate and start looking forward to summer instead. We just have to accept that life's circumstances are rarely consistent. Life will hit us and our children with many ups and downs. But if we can learn to be grateful, seek out the good, and find ways to be content no matter what is crashing around us we will be happier, healthier, and better equipped to weather the storm. 

     So use this time to learn and practice contentment and gratitude as a family. It is one of those lessons that will be priceless in the time's ahead. You've got this Warrior parents. Together we are stronger and we will pull through this.  

#RaiseAWarrior