So how do we teach our children about money and spending? Previously these things were touched on in a Home Ecs class and then reinforced in the home. But as modern conveniences like Amazon Prime, Grocery pickup, snap chat, etc become more and more prevalent our society has shifted to a very strong sense of instant gratification. Because of this mindset shift, many of our youth grow up unprepared to take on the responsibilities of adulthood. It isn't random happenstance that has led to more and more 18-25 year olds continuing to live with their parents and not being in a hurry to have the responsibility of a car, driving, and a steady job. It's true that every generation faces different challenges than the one before, but why aren't we still covering the basics that remain essentially the same? If we don't take the time to prepare our children to face the basics of budgeting, frugality, and delayed gratification now than what is to stop them from drowning under a mountain of credit card debt and student loans later?Money is a difficult concept for young children so here are some ways to start broaching this topic and use other methods of parenting to begin instilling a sense of delayed gratification in a buy now, pay later world.
Start Small:
Delayed gratification touches many aspects of our daily life, not just when it comes to money. So when opportunities come up use it to teach them this amazing concept of self control. Kid requesting a snack before dinner? A snack isn't inherently bad so, yes, you can have a snack... but if you are too full and don't eat all your dinner you have to watch everyone else eat dessert. Kid super excited to tell you a story and keeps interrupting? Yes I'm sure the story is very interesting, but the world doesn't tolerate rude people very well so take a moment to make them better. Now they can't share their story until you're done with your present errand/conversation AND the next one. They might not remember their epic story by then, but they are starting to see that the world doesn't only revolve around them and that what you're doing matters too.
Give Kids Their Own Money:
We can't expect our children to learn about money without getting to actually practice with it. Whether this means a weekly/monthly allowance, or money they earn by working for it, those details are small compared to the chance to learn, grow, and make mistakes in a safe environment. There is a lot of good advice out there on the topic so take a moment to research it before instituting this concept into your home. Self sufficient kids has some awesome articles on the topic. We especially loved their advice that younger kids (10 and under) could be paid .50 cents to $1 a week based on their age. So a five year old would earn $2.50 or $5 per week. A small price to pay to keep them from financially ruining themselves before they're even thinking long term like mortgage, family, car, college, and career.
Set Clear Expectations & Follow Through:
Whether you decide to give your child a weekly/monthly allowance, or whether you choose to pay them for extra chores once we've crossed into the realm of money management we need to set some clear boundaries and expectations for behavior. A child with money of their own should ask for nonessential treats less and eventually not at all. If we continue to pay for everything as before AND give them money we aren't teaching them the importance of self control, saving, and goal setting. If they want a new toy, or candy bar in the grocery line they have to decide if they want to spend their money on it or not. And they are going to make mistakes. A lot of them. But to cry now because you bought too much candy and now have less money for to spend playing games at the local fair is better than taking on a car payment greater than you can afford. In the end it will hurt them a lot less and they will thank you for it one day.
Setting Financial Goals:
One of the perks of money is we can save it for some really amazing things, but saving money is a very boring process and requires discipline no matter how old we are. Now a child with an allowance definitely isn't saving up for a beach vacation, but there are ways to teach them how to set and achieve financial goals. Does you kid want a phone, game system, or other expensive and nonessential electronic device? Teach them a bit about 401k's by offering to match their savings towards one. Have a vacation coming up? Let them know what you're willing to put towards souvenirs and let them save for the rest. Taking the time to teach your child these lessons now will take some planning, but it will also enable them to live the life they want later. And that is an investment worth supporting.
Resist Comparing Yourself to Others:
This one can be hard especially for the older kids who are entering the age where they have cell phones and regularly get to use social media and have internet access. Comparison is something we all struggle with at times. So it is important to teach our children that comparison is natural, but it is also a thief of joy. I remember growing up I was super proud of my knock off Chuck Taylor's until some pointed out they were an off brand. My favorite shoes I had been so proud of now seemed cheap and less than before. Had anything changed about the shoes themselves? Not at all. But my view of them had changed because of another. As kids get older they will want more and more material things, trying to be cool, to fit in, and keep up with their peers. It is okay for them to seek those things and waste some money along the way. So long as we are teaching them to also be thankful for what we have and that we stop comparing our belongings and life to others. And this is a poignant lesson we need over and over again no matter our age.
So whether you're pro allowances or not, we think it's very important to acknowledge today's instant gratification mindset as a parent and to seek out ways to combat it in your child. And above all, enjoy the journey! Our time of influence is short, but so pivotal to a growing Warrior. Invest in that, invest in them.
#RaiseAWarrior
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